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4-29-05,
12:45 AM
I don't
like black people? I am Mister Black
People.
Music:
Doug and the Slugs - Too Bad
 Thought
I'd pop on really quick before I
shuffle off to bed. I started a new
job up at Maritz, packing boxes in
the warehouse, and between that and
my classes it's leaving me with much
less free time. It might not have
been such a hot idea to take the job
when I'm really falling behind in my
studies and these new hours are
leaving me with little time at home,
and I'm not really willing to
sacrifice much sleep.
I
apologize if I've been hard to get
ahold of lately, there's a reason.
I'll be playing catch-up most of the
weekend as well. I really should
have waited until the semester was
over, at least.
Today a small child asked me if I
played Hagrid in Harry Potter.
I wasn't quite sure how to react to
that. Thought I'd share.
I'll
try to update again this weekend.
-K.
drop that
rhubarb
4-15-05,
8:07 PM
I know
how you feel. You don't know if you
want to hit me or kiss me. I get a
lot of that.
Music:
Orbital - Dr. Who
I'm
thinking about giving the free games
list its own section, that way I'll
be able to add on to it as I see
fit. Also because this site is
severely lacking in content.
So I
pay $4.95 a month to Lycos to get
extra space on my e-mail account, as
well as a spam blocker, and it does
its job fairly well. I had to
abandon my Earthlink address a few
years ago because I was getting over
100 spam e-mails a day. I'm sure
it's still active, but I'd hate to
see what it looks like now.
However, the spam blocker doesn't
catch everything, but since I only
get one spam e-mail a day I think
it's manageable. I also don't mind
when the names of the author are
this amusing, I wish I started
saving them all earlier, but here's
a short list of the kinds of names
I'm getting:
Decolonizes T. Puree
Facetiously V. Trapezoids
Lowbrows V. Drawbridges
Guavas O. Choreography
Waterproof H. Norway
These fake names are so brilliant on
their own that I do have some regret
deleting the messages, because I
don't even think Monty Python could
rival the sheer silliness of these.
I would someday like to have a
business card that says "Facetiously
V. Trapezoids, Director of Directing
Directors."
I
also got an e-mail from a sprint.ca
address that contained no text, only
a zip attachment. Thank god I'm not
retarded or work at an office
building, otherwise I'd be unable to
resist! The name was a little odd,
it came from a user named "solongsally,"
which I'm wondering if it was
generated to try to confuse me into
thinking it was myself.
Oh ho, I'm too clever for them.
-K.
imagine what e-mail will be like...
IN SPACE!
4-14-05,
8:32 AM
Rip 'em!
Rip 'em! Rip 'em! Come on, Randy!
Let's go, Charlie! We're gonna take
on Jake Bullet!
Music:
David Bowie - Conversation Piece
If
you want to skip to the bottom where
I list a bunch of free games, go
ahead, I won't mind.
So,
since I never go out and do social
things, you may wonder what exactly
I do on any given day besides go to
class. Okay, probably not, but I'll
pretend you do.
A large portion of my day is spent
sitting in front of this computer,
which shouldn't be surprising. Some
of the time I just sort of stare at
the screen and space out, panicking
over assignments I haven't finished,
and in many cases haven't started
yet. Related to that is spending a
good chunk of time trying to figure
out how to delay doing those
assignments.
During non-panic time I like to sit
and think about different subjects
until they come close to driving me
insane. Have you ever taken the time
to ponder just how far the universe
stretches? There's a lot of stuff in
it and it goes on forever!
Say you traveled into the future and
while you were there you picked up a
copy of a current best-selling
novel. You take it back with you to
the present and decide to release it
under your name. It's safe to assume
that the original author won't go on
to write said novel because you've
claimed it as your own, so how can
it exist in the future for you to
steal? Stuff like that can keep me
in my seat for days.
This should leave no mystery as to
why I'm single.
Well, then there's games, lots of 'em.
I haven't posted about anything I've
been playing lately, but that
doesn't mean I haven't been cutting
back.
I picked up Splinter Cell: Chaos
Theory the day it was released,
the super-duper 2-disc limited
edition version that comes in a
metal case. The game looks great,
the soundtrack is incredible (And,
apparently, I was the only person
who had no clue who Amon Tobin was
before it was announced he was on to
do the music), and is a blast to
play, though it is much easier than
the first two. The problem is that a
major selling point for me was the
addition of two-player co-op play,
so I was a little disappointed that
it's broken, in the PC version at
least. If you're even lucky enough
to get a game started, it's
not likely you'll be able to keep
playing for more than twenty minutes
before being disconnected, thanks to
Ubi.com's brilliant service. They
say they're working on it, but it's
been a good three weeks now.
Something similar happened with the
PC version of Pandora Tomorrow
where a handful of bugs made the
multiplayer nearly unplayable and by
the time Ubisoft actually decided to
fix it there wasn't much of a
community left playing it.
SWAT 4 has been taking up a
good portion of my time lately, as
well. SWAT 3 remains one of
the best tactical shooters ever
made, I'd even put it above
Rainbow Six, it just fell a
little short in the visual
department for some people. But it
shined with its strategic elements,
being able to dynamically command
your team with a fairly wide variety
of actions, and for the most part
they were smart enough to carry out
their orders without you having to
be the first one through the door so
they don't get themselves killed.
SWAT 4 isn't necessarily a
better game, but it is a worth
successor, and looks a whole lot
better, but the single-player
campaign is much too short, and I
don't agree with their scoring
system. Depending on what skill
level you play on means you have to
attain a certain score on a level,
and since there's a much larger
emphasis this time around on using
deadly force as a last resort, it
can be a little hard not to get
penalized for using excessive force.
You pretty much have to be getting
shot at first in order to shoot
back, and I just don't agree with
that. If you're a suspect and I'm
part of a SWAT team busting through
the door with very large guns drawn
and shouting for you to drop your
weapon and get on the ground and you
don't comply right away I don't want
to take the risk of you deciding to
spray me with a few rounds, you're
getting shot. Oddly enough, you can
shoot a restrained suspect as much
as you want with the beanbag
shotgun, the tazer, or the pepper
spray without fear of a penalty.
I'm happy to report that Gearbox's
Brothers in Arms has lived up
to all of its promises, delivering a
very gritty, violent and realistic
World War 2 shooter. What sets it
apart from the others is being able
to command up to two different
squads of soldiers around the
battlefield, the emphasis being on
suppress and flanking maneuvers. The
only major problem I have with it is
the console-style checkpoint saving
carried over from the XBox version.
It isn't too far into the game that
it starts to get pretty damn hard
and you'll end up getting killed
quite a bit, which means many times
you'll lose a good bit of progress
and be forced to do it all over
again. Couple that with some long
load times and it can put a strain
on your patience. It frustrated me
to no end to have to take three or
four attempts to lead my men through
an area filled with German squads
and machine gun nests, to reach the
end and one lone German soldier
remains, only for him to run to a
machine gun and mow me down by
firing it a seemingly impossible
angle. It took me another five or
six tries to make it that far again.
The new Doom 3 expansion,
titled Resurrection of Evil,
is really just plain silly. I
haven't really played it a whole
lot, but the story itself is a
little absurd. Taking place a few
months after the events of the
original game, the UAC has decided
to resume operations at the Mars
base, replacing the hundreds of
people working there that died, only
to have hell break loose... Again!
You play a member of a squad of
soldiers sent in to investigate the
Martian ruins where the hell
invasion originated. Your team comes
across a strange artifact in the
rubble and, naturally, your
character touches it, which somehow
sparks the demons to come through
again and kills everybody in the
immediate vicinity. Apart from the
alien artifact which you can use to
dispatch your enemies as well as
slow down time (They call it "Hell
Time," aren't they clever? Answer:
no.), they've reintroduced the
double-barreled shotgun to the
series, as well as the weapon called
the Grabber. This weapon sparked a
sad fanboy debate because of it's
similarity to Half-Life 2's
gravity gun and in id's defense,
they did have the basic code in
place for such a weapon to exist.
The major different between the
Grabber and the Gravity Gun is that
the latter is actually useful. To
make a long story short, I'm not
impressed.
I've been playing a lot of NES games
on my GBA lately, as well, mostly
the original Dragon Warrior
and Castlevania II. It's odd
how the second game is much more
like the Castlevania games of
today, with an inventory system, NPC,
and light RPG-leveling system, but
after that they went back to the
basic platform style for the next
few games and wouldn't be like that
again until Symphony of the Night
was released.
Okay, after a three month break
The Underdogs finally updated
with some new, great stuff to
download, and since I know a good
deal of you aren't running
powerhouses, I thought I'd take the
time to recommend some games.
Arx Fatalis
- Taking place in a world
where humans live underground,
you're placed in the boots of a
warrior fighting to save his people.
This RPG features some great combat
and a unique spellcasting system,
making for an addictive, light
hack-and-slash.
Gothic
- If you can get past the
somewhat confusing and muddled
control scheme, you'll find a very
long and enjoyable RPG/adventure
here, loaded with quests and unique,
intelligent NPCs in a fairly large
world.
HeroQuest
- Fan made remake of the
original PC game, which itself was
based on the RPG board game of the
same name. I came across my Hero
Quest board a couple days ago
and realized I never actually played
it.
Little Big
Adventure &
Little Big
Adventure 2 - Two
great, imaginative action/adventure
classics centered around a young man
named Twinsen as he fights a cruel
dictatorship to save his planet.
Strife
- Long before Deus Ex,
this fantasy/sci-fi shooter featured
many similar features, including a
large cast of NPCs, upgradeable
stats and an engaging story with
multiple endings. All this on the
Doom engine, too.
Savage
- A fantasy-based FPS/RTS
online-only hybrid that works pretty
well. The developers just recently
offered the full game up for free,
so there should be a resurgence of
players and servers to play on.
Take No
Prisoners - A
unique and very violent top-down
shooter that plays like a standard
FPS in a pretty interesting
environment. Though not very
expansive, it is somewhat non-linear
in allowing you to explore its
Escape From New York-esque
setting.
Space Crusade
- An entertaining little
strategy game based in the
Warhammer 40k universe, putting
you in control of a squad of elite
space marines clearing out their
hijacked spacecraft.
Blood Omen:
Legacy of Kain -
The start of the Legacy of Kain
series, this game puts you in
control of the title character,
hacking and slashing your way
through dungeons and towns in a very
Legend of Zelda-like fashion.
System Shock 2
- One of the most immersive
and frightening games I've ever
played, this FPS/RPG combo is a
complete classic. After waking up
out of suspended animation on a
massive deep space research ship,
you find that much of the craft has
been taken over by an alien
infestation that's up to you to
fight back, as well as contend with
the ship's security systems and a
mysterious AI that has an agenda of
her own. There is no excuse not to
get this.
Wasteland
- Before Fallout,
there was Wasteland. Sure,
this RPG's dated, but it's still a
blast to play.
Metal Gear
Solid - I really
shouldn't have to describe this one
to you, should I?
Blood
&
Blood 2: The
Chosen - Really,
I don't know how these two shooters
are connected other than having the
same main character. The first one
features some very unique settings
and weapons, as well as a very dark
and very funny sense of humor. The
second one, while looking better and
being fun to play, lost much of the
style that made the original so
great, but is still worth a try.
Marathon 2:
Durandal - Marathon
was to Mac users as Doom
was to PC users, with the difference
being that Marathon featured
a running narrative and friendly
characters. Eventually it was ported
to PC, but got lost in the shuffle
after Quake hit the market.
It's worth a look to see what put
the Bungie guys on the map long
before they made Halo.
Cave Story
- An interesting little
freeware platformer from our friends
across the Pacific, you play a
soldier with no memory who fights
his way through several varied
environments while collecting new
weapons and improving your
abilities.
Capture the
Flag - One of the
first turn-based strategy games I've
ever played, this game is still as
fun as it was ten years ago. You
lead a team of kids with varied
attributes against an opposing team
through a rural environment with the
ultimate goal of reaching the
enemy's flag first.
X-COM:
Apocalypse - The
sci-fi answer to Jagged Alliance,
you lead a squad of soldiers against
an invading alien menace, and it's
just as addictive.
Dungeon Keeper
Gold - A very
unique "god" game which, as you
would expect, has you managing a
dungeon. Harvesting resources,
expanding, and keeping heroes out,
there's quite a lot to do in this
addictive strategy title.
Doom: The
Roguelike - As
the name suggests, this is a fun
little Rogue clone set in the
Doom universe. If you're
unfamiliar with Rogue, it's a
simple, text-based RPG that's been
around longer than most of us and
still has a good-sized fan base to
this day.
Dungeon Siege
(demo) - I
installed this again the other day
and I think I was unfair to it when
it was first released, I played it
for quite a while last night. It's a
large RPG with an emphasis on
combat, and lots of it.
Jagged
Alliance 2 (demo) -
You've heard me harp enough
about this on the site, so I thought
I'd just toss this in. If you take
the time to learn the complex
interface and play mechanics, you'll
find just about the best turn-based
strategy game ever in this.
Silent Storm
&
Silent Storm:
Sentinels (demos) -
Heavily inspired by the
Jagged Alliance series, these
games have you leading squads of
elite soldiers on both sides against
a common terrorist threat during
World War II.
Those of you using XP may need to
use
DOSBox,
a DOS emulator, to play some of
these games. This is because
Microsoft, in their infinite wisdom,
decided not to include DOS support
in XP, despite already having it in
previous versions of Windows.
I
think that's enough for now.
-K.
queerin' don't make the world work
4-11-05,
4:33 AM
Put it
on a dead guy and bury it.
Music: I
Monster - The Blue Wrath
Updated the What to Think section.
Since it seems that it's no longer
going to be a required assignment I
don't think I'm ever going to get
around to editing the script of the
first episode of The Apocalypse
Man so I'm just going to go
ahead and put up what's there, with
only the slightest dialogue trimming
done since I first turned it in.
That included your "carbon shadows"
line, sorry Theron.
Just because I could, I decided to
convert it to PDF while I was up at
Webster last night, not knowing it
would screw up the format a little.
It had been sixteen pages before I
converted it.
Ah well, it looks a little slicker.
I'm not terribly unhappy with the
first half, but as soon as Jasper is
introduced my anti-Midas touch
really starts to make itself clear.
If anything I've learned it's very
hard to try to combine about ten
different genres into piece of
material. Since it starts off very
grim and surreal it makes the humor
and comic book-style action seem
weak and out of place, and I don't
think it's the fault of the concept,
I think it's the fault of my
ineptitude as a writer.
It's in the Bits and Pieces section.
So
now my next assignment is writing
the first act of a feature film,
which is roughly 35 pages. I managed
to jam out the first three pages in
about an hour, which surprised me,
because for me writing is a long,
laborious process where I can spend
twenty minutes re-writing a
particular line of dialogue and
still think it sucks. I think it
came out easier than usual because
it's a pretty weak opening scene and
I'm certain that when I meet with
Joe on Tuesday and show him the
first ten pages he's going to
suggest I change it or just cut it.
And I'm so ashamed of the idea I'm
working on that I'm not going to go
into detail with it. A prison and a
secret experiment in the distant
future, which sounds awful cheesy.
I would've fleshed out the idea I
had about a road trip, buddy comedy
about a couple of slackers that
become organ traffickers, but I
don't like to be forced into being
funny.
-K.
can we
please get back to the issue of the
gravy?
4-3-05,
10:43 PM
Three
murders? This is getting serious.
Music:
Ben Folds Five - Selfless, Cold, and
Composed
I've
been meaning to update, I just
haven't had anything to talk about
recently. The Pope, Terri Schiavo
and comedian Mitch Hedberg all died
within the last couple days. I
wasn't a big Mitch fan, I didn't
dislike him, though, but apparently
he was a man who loved his drugs.
Finally updated the What to Think
page, and changed the front page
image.
I
apologize for getting tossing my hat
into a serious issue in my last
post, I should know better.
The
news on the home front is that Blake
isn't moving out until May now. My
grandfather underestimated how long
it was going to take to renovate the
flat. Imagine my confusion and
subsequent anger and frustration
when March was coming to a close and
he was still fucking here. I had to
pick up him from the Moolah last
night because he locked his keys in
his car, it's funny that since the
Final Four started that downtown is
the last place I want to be, and
it's exactly where Blake manages to
get stuck and needs my help. Even at
two in the morning, many of the
100,000+ jackasses that have
descended upon the city are out and
about, clogging up traffic, driving
erratically from not knowing where
exactly they're going, and
pedestrians doing general asshole
things like not waiting until
they're all the way across the
street to stop and answer their cell
phone. I should probably say that I
don't care about basketball in the
slightest, so that's also a strike
against this whole mess.
I did spend quite a bit of time one
day downtown, walking and driving
around, on one of the first really
nice days before everything went to
shit because of the Final Four. It
made me wish I was still in a
photography class so I could use
Webster's dark room.
Lastly, an anecdote from last night
involving my father: I was walking
around the house yesterday evening
when my dad called me into the
living room. He had been watching an
episode of Real Time with Bill
Maher, which I had noticed him doing
earlier and thought that was very
unlike him. Maher and his guests
were talking about Terri Schiavo and
all the fallout that has risen from
the incident, taking the time to
criticize Bush and his "Culture of
Life" hypocritical bullshit. I walk
into the room, he puts his arm
around my shoulder with his left
hand, and says "You know, I really
don't like guys like him," he says
as he points to Alec Baldwin with
his right, "and her," pointing to
Whoopi Goldberg, "and I really hate
that Bill Maher guy. But in this
particular case, I happen to agree
with everything they're saying, so I
have to go to bed now." He walks
away without another word.
-K.
pope-a's got a
brand new bag
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